


Wriggling Day

by Broba



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Birthday, EMOTIONS EMOTIONS EMOTIONS, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, Other, kinkmeme fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-11
Updated: 2012-08-11
Packaged: 2017-11-11 22:31:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/483568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Broba/pseuds/Broba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The troll tradition of wriggling day is, naturally, horrible and an intensely unpleasant experience. Now that Karkat's is coming up, Dave decides it's time to put a stop to that noise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wriggling Day

Meanwhile, within a meteor that tumbled endlessly through an interstellar void...  
  
Karkat grumped and grumbled his way along a corridor. The progress he made was entirely proportional to the volume of the grumbling. He seemed to have no particular destination in mind, the journey was more about voluble complaints in a barely muted angry hiss then actually getting anyway. This was starting to drive Dave completely shit-hive maggots by the time Karkat completed his third circuit of their communal living area. He sought out the counsel of his friend.  
  
“Hey Zee,” he announced as he walked boldly into Terezi's room, deliberately not knocking.  
“Dave!” she crooned, leaning back on her chair vertiginously and letting her head flop over backwards to gaze blankly in his general direction, “how dare you! I might have been undressed or anything, it's a scandal!”  
“Yeah it's cause I'm hella into you. I just got to find out if you're grey all the way down.”  
“Want to find out?”  
“You know it. Let's get a bad thing going on right now. Paint the walls in our shame juice.”  
She sniggered noisily and rolled over to straddle her chair, facing him and leaning her arms on the backrest. The constant sexualised teasing was a firmly established aspect of their relationship by now and they both delighted in needling the other mercilessly.  
“Hey coolkid, come here and show me what you humans have got to work with.”  
“How do you know I'm not stark-ass naked already? I like wriggling some plush rump in your general direction, its my thing now.”  
“Would you let me touch it?”  
“You could bounce a dime of this pert an' perfect business I got goin' on back here. Careful- it'll snap on your fingers like a trap.”  
“Dave!” He was always the best at their little games. He had the unabashed self-confidence to always push it a little further then she did. Now that they had got over the necessary preliminaries, Dave went over to her and sat down on the floor nearby with his back up the wall, like a gangling pile of limbs.  
  
“What's on your mind, human?”  
“Urrgh. It's this bullshit with Karkat, don't you know?”  
“What, you mean the pacing? The muttering? The way he keeps happening to wander past my block and raise his voice just a little? Now why would I notice a thing like that Dave?”  
“So. Are you gonna tell me what's going on or are we going to dance around the bullshit pole some more?”  
“You don't like my pole dancing Dave? It doesn't entice you? Do you wish to place human currency units within the confines of my elasticated genital retention garment? I will rotate and wiggle for you, Mister Dave.”  
  
Sometimes, Dave regretted telling Terezi about elements of human culture. She never forgot anything, and she had a knack of suddenly becoming a lot less naïve and oblivious at a moment's notice.  
  
“Uh,” he began, but it was too late she had won and he was already flushed at the imagery going through his mind. Terezi grinned because she knew damn well.  
“Dave you're such a-” she paused and made a vague waving motion while Dave waited patiently. She was searching for the appropriate human word.  “You're a silly-man. Is that a thing?”  
“What's the troll term?” She made a harsh cluck in the back of her throat and Dave nodded, “just say idiot, it's close enough.”  
“Aww Dave, I don't like to be constrained by my limited appreciation of your language, the nuances-”  
“Rezi? Concentrate?”  
“Urgh. Fine. What I mean is, how is it that the blind girl can see exactly what's going on and you can't with all your advantages!”  
“Well just pretend like I didn't grow up in your bullshit alien mentalist society and you have to explain all this random moody troll shit to me, huh?”  
“Karkat is coming up on his wriggling day, it's got him in a fuss.”  
“You mean it's his birthday?”  
“Mm-hm, as you call it, in three days.”  
“Sweet. About time we had a party, remember when we did yours? It was sweet.”  
“I know, and Kanaya appreciated the effort you humans made on her day too. But this is different.”  
“How so?”  
“Karkat is such a,” she smiled like a cat eyeing a mosquito, “traditionalist sometimes. Not like me and Kanaya, we're just delighted to embrace new ideas and human customs! Like birthdays and such. Karkat is trying to let us know in his own way that he's not going to put up with such behaviour. He intends to spend his wriggling day in a horrifying introspective depression the way it's always meant to be.”  
Dave rubbed at his suddenly aching forehead, “for real? That's why all the moaning and bitching? He's working himself up to a bad mood?”  
“A Karkat-sized bad mood!”  
Dave looked up slowly as the enormity hit him. “Sweet mother of God,” he breathed.  
  
Kanaya was busying herself with her latest plant experiments when Dave found her. The meteor had a small but well equipped botanical section complete with sun-lamps and she was trying to persuade a few seedlings to sprout, with little success. Considering their ability to alchematize items as necessary, the effort was lost on Dave.  
“Hey Kan,” he raised a hand in greeting and she straightened up, pressing both palms into the small of her back and stretching with a dainty little grunt.  
“Ah, human Dave,” she said gravely, “I assume that you are here because of the irresistible sexual allure that my curvature engenders.”  
“You,” said Dave with a chuckle, “have been talking to Terezi.”  
“Of course. How am I doing? Do you not find my human swag enticing?”  
“Not bad but keep at it.”  
“Karkat thinks we're becoming disgustingly human,” she said flatly, “and adopting the degenerate practices of a fundamentally inferior culture.”  
“He said that?”  
“It is the overall thrust of his actual comments.”  
“Figures. I wanted to talk to you about him actually.”  
“Oh?” She put down her watering can and brushed her hands off, sitting down on a lawn chair, and offering him an upturned seed tub to sit on.  
“Yeah. It's his wriggling day soon, right?”  
“Ah, yes. He has been building up to it in his usual manner.”  
“He's done this before?”  
“Oh yes. I haven't known him as long as Terezi, but I recall two of his prior wriggling days. The... damage... was considerable.”  
“Shit, this all sounds pretty intense. What is it with you guys and wriggling day, anyway?”  
“Well,” she thought about it for a moment, “wriggling day commemorates the moment when a young troll wriggler finally emerges from their chrysalis.”  
“And blinking, steps into the sun?”  
“Something like that. Wriggles. And from that moment-”  
“More to see then can ever be seen? More to do then can ever be done?”  
“Um, well yes I suppose? And a troll wriggler is, as you can imagine, our most vulnerable form. Every year many are lost to predation or exposure to the elements.”  
“It's the circle of life...”  
“Dave, are you making a comparison to some obscure point of human culture? I feel that you are.”  
“Sorry! Sorry. I'll stop. Go on, I'm listening.”  
  
“We all remember it, vaguely. Usually the memories are half-formed, just sense-impressions without any context really. But the overriding feeling of that time is one of helpless vulnerability. To a troll it is the most traumatic time of life and most repellent memory. Our wriggling day is a reminder of where we came from, and traditionally trolls use this time to examine and criticise their innermost flaws and weaknesses in order to better themselves.”  
“So Karkat is building up to rip himself a new one?”  
“I can only imagine that colloquialism is unerringly accurate.”  
“But that's basically what he does all the time anyway, isn't it?”  
“Oh no,” said Kanaya gravely, “on wriggling day, he's far worse.”  
  
Rose was, as ever, poring over some long forgotten tome of ancient and eldrich lore when Dave caught up to her. At least she understood the concept of a birthday, and when Dave explained the situation to her she nodded thoughtfully.  
“I didn't think you cared,” she said, with an amused little smile.  
“About Karkat you mean?”  
“Mm.”  
“When I was a kid we didn't really have very much. But on my birthday, no matter how hard-up we were, no matter how much a little shit I'd been, my Bro always made it a special day. I mean, you know my Bro. Sometimes he was a little crazy about it, but he always came through for me. My Bro always said that when it's your birthday, it's your special day.” He trailed off, as it occurred to him how lame he must sound.  
“Go on,” said Rose softly.  
“Well, it's not like I'm in love with the guy. But even Karkat deserves one day of the year when he doesn't have to be in such a fuckin' foul mood over everything.”  
“Why Dave, I do believe you are intending on performing a genuine and noble act on behalf of another person. I'm impressed.”  
“Yeah I'm pretty much the best guy, I know.”  
She reached over and patted his knee, “you really are.”  
  
The fateful day came. Karkat himself was flagging and wavering by the time Dave caught up to him. He was sweating profusely and he looked as though he hadn't slept or rested in at least an entire day, perhaps more. For all his physical exhaustion Karkat's loathing was undimmed and as Dave approached him he could hear on the edge of his perception the low muttering voice, the stream of incredible elaborate metaphors wrought into demeaning insults of epic cruelty.  
“Hey dude,”  
Karkat stopped dead and swivelled slowly. “Human.”  
“What you doin' there? Muttering grimly under your breath? Gonna think about all your past mistakes and dwell on them for your wriggling day?”  
“Fuck off.”  
Dave smirked and loped on beside Karkat as the troll turned away.  
“Gonna think about everything that went wrong? Huh? Think about the lessons you shoulda learned? The tragic inevitably of your inability to learn 'em? Huh? Gonna seethe about it a while, ponder the ultimate absurdity of a universe in which rational beings can exist without any evidence of rationality? Gonna think about that a while?”  
Karkat took a deep breath and swivelled to face Dave. He drew in every ounce of air he could, and then produced a strange, extended hissing sound. This went on for long enough to seem awkward.  
“Uh-” said Dave.  
Karkat continued.  
“Hey, Karkat? Are you actually saying 'fuck you' so long and so hard that it's just coming out as a long meaningless noise?”  
In front of him, Karkat nodded balefully as he continued.  
“Look you don't have to- oh we're still going with this. Okay. Jesus, how much breath have you got? Karkat- dude you're going to give yourself a rupture! Stop with the- stop it! It's starting to get really weird!”  
  
Karkat was halfway through the first consonant of bitter invective when Dave finally got tired of waiting and threw an arm leisurely around Karkat's shoulder and span him around. Karkat was so appalled he actually shut up, gasping for breath.  
“Listen dude, I know we haven't always been on the best of terms.”  
“True. I fucking hate you so much.”  
“Welp. Get ready for all that to change. See, I know it's your wriggling day-”  
“Oh no- no you fucking didn't. I will fucking kill you so slow, so painfully slow and brutally, you won't even know it's happening till you see a white fucking light-”  
“Relax! C'mon, we've been through a lot, right? Deep down, you know we bros, right?”  
“I hope you get really ill one day. Really ill.”  
  
Dave steered Karkat towards the communal eating area, the doorway was unusually dark as no light was on within.  
“Well let me tell you, I've been doing some research into your bullshit wriggling day nonsense, and as you know when Kanaya and Terezi had their wriggling days we all had a bit of a party and it was a great time all round that made everyone very happy,”  
“Dave human, I swear to you, if you've pulled some nightmarish surprise wriggling day festivities I will immediately kill myself.”  
“I thought you were going to kill me?”  
“I imagine that you would die from the shame of what you had done.”  
“Well then. Let's take a look huh?”  
  
Karkat barely had the energy to resist as he was steered unwillingly towards the black doorway and stared into the darkened room. The lights came on, to reveal what was within.  
  
“Nothing,” said Karkat. Empty space, blank walls. Functional metal tables with steel benches bolted to them. The faint hum from the light fixtures and the occasional rattle of the ventilator system were the only sounds.  
“Yup.”  
“No ridiculous human party.”  
“That's right.”  
“No fucking... party hats and shit?”  
“Uh huh.”  
  
Karkat nodded slowly, taking it in. Then he went to the replimat and ordered a plate of grubloaf, moving to one of the tables and setting his plate down quietly.  
“Wriggling day,” said Dave, “have a fuckin' miserable one.”  
“I plan on it,” said Karkat bitterly as he stabbed the grubloaf with his feeding implements.  
  
In the doorway Dave watched him impassively for a moment, a slight smile playing over his features.  
“What.” Said Karkat blankly, not bothering to look up at the human.  
“Admit it, you thought we were throwing you a surprise party.”  
“You showed a little fucking restraint and dignity for once. I'm glad.”  
“So you got exactly what you wanted for your wriggling day, nothing at all.”  
Karkat slapped his fork down and waved at the empty room in frustration, “well is certainly fucking looks that way, doesn't it!”  
“Yeah, but isn't there just some tiny little part of you, way deep down in your shitty black little heart, that hoped we would?”  
“Look around you, look where we ended up,” Karkat mumbled, staring down at his meal, “hope is just another stupid human word that doesn't even mean anything.”  
“Maybe,” agreed Dave. “But hey, there's something you forgot.”  
Karkat groaned, “and what's that?”  
“Knight of motherfuckin' time, man.”  
  
Karkat thought he had blinked. There was a sudden blur of motion, impossibly fast. He had an impression for a fraction of a second, of Dave surrounding him everywhere- a hundred or more Daves.  
  
Light blazed from every direction, the blank walls were a cacophony of red ribbons, music crackled into life over the intercom systems. Karkat looked down and found he was staring at an enormous, if sloppily alchematized, cake. Someone had scrawled “CANDY BOY” across the side with random blind strokes of an icing brush, the letters falling diagonally across several layers of the cake. He had no doubt who was responsible for that touch. With a thump Terezi landed on the bench next to him, and on the other side of the table Kanaya was whisked into place with a dainty squeak. Karkat was speechless for a moment.  
“You fucks,” he hissed, “you absolute-”  
He was cut off as Terezi enclosed him in an enormous awkward hug. She missed his head entirely and wound her way around his midsection like a very determined constricting beast.  
“Kar-kat!” She trilled, “did you really think we were going to let you just sit alone and be miserable today?”  
“You know how I feel about this day,” he said stiffly, “it's tradition.”  
Kanaya reached across the table to take his hand, “you sound like Equius, you know,” that made him bristle noticeably, “but there's no need. It's just us here, and you don't have to go through your normal unpleasantness for your wriggling day. I must say, the human way of doing things has it's appeal.”  
  
Before Karkat could reply to that Dave, looking a little besmirched and grimy from his herculean efforts, was behind him slapping his back, “eat your fuckin' cake, dude.”  
“I don't want a cake!”  
“Hey check it out, we even got hats!”  
  
Karkat surged to his feet, his fists were balled at his side and shaking with fury. He turned on Dave and took a step forward. “You!”  
“Hey-”  
“You did this! You fucked us over! We may have fucked our world over, but at least we still had some fucking traditions! Now look at us! Look at all-” he waved a hand angrily, “all this! Stuff! What are we supposed to be now?”  
“Karkat. Dude. We've been told what we have to do for too long. Whether it's your stupid traditions, or the game tellin' us we're knight of this or hero of that, and it's about time we started calling that bullshit out and deciding to be what we want for one. So you always spend this day being a fucking asshole at yourself. So what? Who says you have to do that?”  
Kanaya spoke up at that, “we're all we have Karkat, we're the only ones left. There's no one here to judge what we do.”  
“Besides,” said Terezi, looking in the wrong direction, “who even cares? Why not just have some fun for once in your life?”  
Karkat just sat down heavily, and turned to face his cake. On top of it, there was a little vivid red grub made out of marzipan. He realised that he really had nothing personal left to hold back from these people any more, there was no point in pretending.  
“Fuck,” he said softly, and rested his face in his hands.  
  
Karkat felt something touch his back,and realised that Terezi was stroking his spine softly. The motion was oddly comforting and he had to fight to contain a sob that welled up from the core of his chest.  
“We're here for your wriggling day,” said Terezi, “and we want to celebrate, because it's the day you arrived into the world and we think that's something worth remembering,” she leaned over and he felt her whisper inaccurately into his ear, “you're worth it.”  
  
That make Karkat crack, but Terezi squeezed him harder so that the others saw nothing.  
  
“Looks like a party,” announced Dave, who was quite revelling in his role as master of ceremonies. Dave turned to his decks, and prepared to lay down some of the sickest of beats.  
  
The lights flickered again and they all looked around in confusion. Dave just shrugged, it wasn't him this time. The lights flighted again and there was an electrical crackle.  
“That wasn't me,” said Dave, “sounds like a fuse actually-”  
Then everything went black, and there was a sound of tortured, ripping metal. The lights came on again and one of the ceiling panels had been completely torn aside. Suddenly, in front of Karkat, a lithe intimidating figure stood, staring down at the cake with dispassionate eyes. Karkat nearly fell backwards off his seat and Dave reached for his sword automatically.  
  
He had changed, his makeup was different now. There was no variation to it, only a blank, uniform pearlescence. With infinite care and delicacy the white-faced clown bent down and reached out to touch Karkat's cheek where it was damp with a hot tear.  
“Shh,”  
“No-”  
“Shoosh.”  
“Don't go.”  
“Mmm-mm.”  
“Stay!”  
The white-faced clown shook his head and grinned. He touched Karkat on the nose and nodded, and then he was away- surging up and through the hole in the ceiling like an animal, and there was a clattering of limbs for a moment in the ducting system before he was gone.  
  
Dave let out his breath slowly and sheathed his sword.  
“It's okay, he's gone.”  
Karkat just swayed in his seat. Terezi stroked his back and Kanaya reached across to take his hand. She asked something Dave didn't hear, and he saw Karkat nod mutely.  
“Hey, human,” said Karkat softly.  
“Yeah?”  
“Thanks. For this.”  
“S'nothin'. Happy birthday.”


End file.
